I’m not a DAD but…

. . . . I have a very devoted dad and I’m married to a wonderful dad (seen here together a couple years ago)

and I’m related to a bunch of other incredible, loving dads including my brother and a slew of brothers-in-law and cousins – so I think I have a pretty good idea of what makes them happy.

Years ago, the quintessential American Dad, DAVE BARRY, wrote a funny column about that very subject – what dads really want on Fathers Day:

“Father’s Day is coming, and millions of children and/or wives are thinking: ‘This year, I think I’ll get Dad a nice casual shirt.’

Fine. Go ahead. Although you might want to ask yourself a couple of questions first, such as: Does Dad WANT another nice casual shirt? Have you noticed that Dad currently OWNS approximately 73 nice casual shirts, and he wears only two of them? And that he wears one of those two only when the other one is really dirty? Do you honestly believe that Dad is thinking: ‘Boy, I wish I had ANOTHER shirt, so I could not wear it!’?

( . . . . ) For Dad, the perfect Father’s Day would be one in which he didn’t even realize that it WAS Father’s Day, because nobody was making him appreciate gifts he didn’t want, or read greeting cards filled with lame Father’s Day poetry (‘When I was just a little tyke, you showed me how to ride a bike; And you were sweet to me the day, I drove your car into the bay; Dad, I think you’re really grand, I’m praying for your prostate gland’).

There would be none of this, on the perfect Father’s Day. There would be just Dad, wearing his oldest surviving undershorts, free of pressure, maybe just sitting in front of the TV, watching the NBA playoffs. There would be no conversation, other than Dad periodically observing that these players today could carry the ball across Montana and never get called for traveling.

That’s how you can give Dad the perfect Father’s Day. Of course, that’s not all. You’d also make a restaurant reservation, and at the end of the day, you’d dress up and go out and have a nice dinner, during which you’d propose a toast to Dad. Who would be back home, in front of the TV, happily asleep in his veteran underwear. That would be PERFECT.

But you’re going to get him a shirt.”

(excerpted from MIAMI HERALD reprinted on June 8, 2014)


When I read this column I thought about how my own dad would spend his perfect day…. either tending to his vegetable garden, bees & chickens or fishing on a quiet lake in his Old Town canoe. My husband would spend his perfect day living on the edge, speeding around switchbacks in the mountains on his motorcycle or camping with his best college buddies at a rock festival in southern Tennessee.

How would the special dad in your life spend his perfect day?

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9 Comments

  1. Happy Father’s Day to my rockin’ dad! Party on! :)

  2. HFD!!!

  3. Smoking his pipe, tea in hand, gazing at his freshly mowed field.

  4. Working on his hands and knees in the flower garden.

  5. Mowing our huge lawn in all his glory, probably with no shirt on.

  6. Trust Dave Barry to work in underwear on Father’s Day!

  7. Elizabeth Atkinson

    So true :)

    I think it’s a writer thing…. the sublime appeal of full-time loungewear.

  8. In the barn with his projects and tools, friends stopping in for a cold drink.

  9. You have your husband pegged! My dad’s perfect day would have been preparing for a big dinner party, surrounded by family and friends over great food and conversation.

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